Bitches

I hate them! Why are they alive? I think they are mean people. Not mean people that "upper deck" everyone's house that they go to, but mean in a much more devilish way. Why? I'm not sure. I think they hate life and want to make sure everyone knows it. It's funny to be a bitch if you're a nice person. I had a problem with this. I used to be nice. I used to be a real nice young little girl. But then, I started being bitchy as a joke. Oh it was very funny. Everyone couldn't believe nice little girl was being super bitchfest. But then, I grew fond of this bitchy attitude. I do not know what attracted me to adopt this new lifestyle but with every bitch comment that came out of my mouth, I was enjoying it more and more. I still do not like bitches. I am on my way back to being nice. It's kinda tough.

I also believe that bitches date really nice men and it confuses me a lot.

I also think that it's funny to say "Bitch, please!" (but it has to be said like, "BiTCH, PLEEEEEEEEEEZ"

I used to think it was funny to say "Betch" at the time when I also thought OMG Shoes was funny.

Sometimes its funny to say "Besh" but you have to use it VERY sparingly to pull it off. And you have to be nice.

Bitch glares scare me.

I have mastered the Bitch Glare. I have only given it several times. If I give it to you and do not smile afterwards, I would be scared. But then not really because I do not go any further than the bitch glare. Whats next? Bitch glare leads to bitch fight? I choose walking away and making fun of her outfit.

I think bitches are annoying.

This is what I classify a bitch as:

• pink phone


• fake tan


• fake hair


• pointy bitch shoes


• too much attitude


• often found at malls


• often also a slut


• often calls other girls sluts


• wore a tiara on her 16th and 21st birthday


• squeal scream


• often has a permanent mean face on


• says "like" more than anything


• nice to your face, makes fun of you behind your back


• death glare rays


• still calls her father "daddy"


• a huge jerk


• ODs on text messaging


• bitch eye liner


• does not drink beer


• makes the grossed out face at fat people


• complains like no other


• thinks the world revolves around her


• puppy dog eyes her father


• prefers being called princess


• never kills a spider

"Bitches get stitches."

Don't be a bitch.